Stuff Unemployed People Like. Brilliance in Blog Form.

Unemployment doesn't have to be all serious. If it is, you may be one free dose of Zanax (or other free Pfizer medication) away from doing something drastic.

In my random Googling for unemployed freebies (I always find about them after the fact), I came across the brilliant blog, Stuff Unemployed People Like. Sure, a lot of it is a bit over the top, but just reading the list of posts will bring a smile to your face. I have to admit that I found a few useful links in there to boot (more on that later).

A few of my favorites:

• #79 Dating for Dinner
• #59 Annoying Employed Friends While They’re At Work
• #53 Watching Office Space and Reminiscing About the Good Ol’ Days
• #42 Going Back to Sleep After Waking Up Too Early
• #39 Finally Having Time to “Be An Artist”
• #20 Overusing the Phrase “In This Economy”
  

This is a Facebook application waiting to happen. How unemployed are you? A Professional?...Moonlighting?...or an Office Droan Trapped in an Unemployed's Body?

Now excuse me while I go about kicking myself for not buying a new Hyundai, a JetBlue airline ticket and some Thomasville furniture before I lost my job.

This COBRA doesn't bite

Did you know that part of the stimulus package is set up to cover a significant amount of COBRA premiums for those who have recently are will lose their job?

If you're like me, the thought of paying several hundred dollars a month for health insurance when unemployment won't even cover my mortgage payment, well, makes me think twice about a health insurance holiday. But for those who definitely need the continuing coverage or for those who don't want to risk lapsing their coverage and falling into the 'preexisting condition' trap once new coverage is established, there is some relief.

The plan is set to reduce the premium (automatically, once you've enrolled and qualified for the assistance) by 65%.

According to the Department of Labor (DOL) website (the agency responsible for COBRA), the relief is available for someone who is:

• is eligible for COBRA continuation coverage at any time between September 1, 2008 and December 31, 2009;
  
• elects COBRA coverage; and
  
• is eligible for COBRA as a result of the employee's involuntary termination between September 1, 2008 and December 31, 2009.

The following links come from the DOL website, where you can find lots of other related resources:

FAQs on COBRA Premium Reductions

FAQs on COBRA

In terms of health care, this is a great time to be unemployed...assuming you qualify for COBRA and the recovery assistance.

Pink Slip Parties

I'm sure we could all use a party or two these days. Pink Slip Parties are popping up in cities around the country. But this isn't just a time to commiserate with your comrades over some chardonnay.



Pink Slip Parties are the happy hour version of the job fair and allow you to meet with various recruiters in a hip, relaxed environment, rather than a hotel ballroom or college gymnasium.


NJ/PA
http://jobcircle.com/pinkslip/


Los Angeles
http://pinkslippartyla.com/


DC
http://askmissa.com/category/pink-slip-party/


Toronto
http://www.thepinkslipparty.com/Events.html


California (various locations)
http://pinkslip.collectivex.com/calendar


Many more cities have already had Pink Slip Parties. With the growing popularity, I'm sure there will be repeat events. If your city hasn't had a party or doesn't have one scheduled, start one yourself. The best thing to do is Google "Pink Slip Party" and learn about both upcoming events and the best ideas to incorporate into your own. Enjoy!

31% of Nothing (AKA the Federal Mortgage Stimulus Program)

You heard talk about a mortgage assistance program in February. It was the stimulus program flavor of the week lumped in between some plans to help small business owners, senior citizens, the environment...all seeming like eons before we became obsessed with a certain bonus package from a certain bailout recipient. You know what I'm talking about.

Way back when, I had heard stories about the mortgage assistance program and a host of rumors that made me think that I (and apparently no one else it was designed to help) would never qualify.

But alas, that might not be the case.

The aforementioned program is actually two programs. That might be part of the reason that rumors are abound.

1. Home Affordable Refinancing: For homeowners who are current on their payments of a loan owned/guaranteed by Fannie Mae or Freddie Mac with the balance of the loan equal or less than the current value of the loan.

2. Home Affordable Modification: For homeowners who live in the home as their primary residence, acquired the loan before 01/01/09 and the first mortgage (if you have more than one, this is the largest one) is not more than $729,750. Your monthly payment for the first mortgage (including any principal, interest, taxes, insurance and homeowner's association dues, but not PMI) is more than 31% of your GROSS monthly income and you are having trouble paying your mortgage (your mortgage payment recently increased, your income had decreased since the mortgage was secured, or you have medical or other hardship bills that make payments difficult).

Because you probably wouldn't guess it on your own, the official website is http://www.makinghomeaffordable.gov/. They have a brief eligibility quiz (more or less asking about the requirements listed above) and then direct you to the appropriate page.

But don't get too excited, the rabbit at the end of that racetrack is just a recommendation to contact your lender, although it does give a list of the documents you should gather in advance of that phone call. You can also contact their hotline if you need counseling.

If you don't have a headache yet, you can open up the PDF attachment of Frequently Asked Questions. It's not the most user-friendly FAQ repository (make sure you're not looking at the questions in the other program's section).

It also doesn't specifically answer the question about qualifying if you are currently unemployed. Other websites make that connection based on the "reduction in your income since you got your current loan" clause.

As for me, I went to my lender's individual website, clicked on their own link for economic assistance and filled in the generic form to have someone contact me. We'll see what happens with that.

I've heard differing opinions, but it seems fairly consistent that lenders are delaying the foreclosure process for their loans. Having recently visited a real estate website and being awestruck by the average sale prices, I hardly blame them.

If anything comes from my online inquiry, I'll be sure to pass that information along.

As for the programs for small businesses or nutrition for senior citizens, well, I'm afraid you're on your own.

Friday the 13th

Sarcasm is my friend. Irony does not go unappreciated in my world. A good laugh is my best medicine.

But losing your job on Friday the 13th. Well, that's a cruel joke.

Before we get too far, let me recap.

I am a single female professional in my early 30s and have been living and working in Washington, DC and the surrounding area for the last six years. About a year and a half ago, I entered the housing market and became the proud owner of an historic 'fixer-upper'.

And then, on Friday, March 13, 2009, my rug, just like the rug of an increasing number of people, was pulled out from under me when my position was "eliminated".

I have actually been in this position before. An organization-wide layoff left me without a job a few years ago. The difference at that time was that I was a little bit younger and, more importantly, without a mortgage.

Another important difference this time is that I'm not alone. Far from it. Even before my professional world unexpectedly came to a crashing halt, I was plagued by the daily news alerts of mass layoffs, bankruptcy and other recession casualty reports.

If there is comfort in not knowing what, how or when, its the fact that I am now part of a club. Anybody who's anybody has been laid off or had their house foreclosed upon. Why not come together?

This blog is one part advice, one part voyeuristic look at my experiences and one part forget about your troubles and just laugh.

And since I certainly don't have all of the answers, I encourage you all to write in, comment and share the good, the bad and the funny about life on this side of the recession.

Although the term "Mafia" conjures up all sorts of images of crime, it also implies a sense of family. A mafia family is not necessarily related by blood, but they protect each other. Your mafia family has your back. If you have found yourself a casualty of this recession, the Pink Slip Mafia has your back.